9.07.2012

echoes

 victoria bc aug '2012 love those giant tween-ish babies of mine

How is it that at the end of the day, the echoes of failure can haunt a mama?
The echoes of parenting failure, how can it be?
Are those regrets? 
Shattered hopes? 
Impossible tasks? 
Missed opportunities?
Today was a day of great adventure and learning, 
a wild field trip to the state capitol and beyond, to the gold country.  
Home again filled with  notions of Miwok Indian Tribes, 
elaborate backyard play and basket weaving.
Yet, in my heart, I carry failure.
I lost my temper, used my words unfairly and did not extend grace.
Grace, dang, I even have that tattooed on my arm so I would not forget.
Grace
In my heart I wish to carry patience, grace and love.
I do carry them there.
Yet, in a moment, I failed,
but grace there is and mercy starts a new day.
 ***

all is made well but let is be said, 
parenting is not for the faint of heart.
this parenting gig is the hardest thing ever.
and i don't even have teenagers yet!

2 comments:

  1. Sounds like you're having the same week I am.

    ReplyDelete
  2. The hardest part, I find for myself, is at times admitting that "I have failed" and receiving the grace God gives to move on....versus believing the lie of Satan that "I am a failure" and not being able to move past it.
    Thanks for your honesty.
    Steph

    ReplyDelete

I love comments!